The Secret Ingredient in Great Parenting

“You should let him (your child) see that you love him.  Love should be the silver thread that runs throughout all your conduct.  Kindness, gentleness, long-suffering, forbearance, patience, sympathy, a willingness to enter into childish troubles, a readiness to take part in childish joys,-these are the cords by which a child may be led most easily,-these are the clues you must follow if you would find the way to his heart.  Sternness and severity of manner chill them and throw them back.  It shuts up their hearts, and you will weary yourself to find the door.  Children are weak and tender creatures, and, as such, they need patient and considerate treatment.  We must not expect all things at once.  We must remember what children are, and teach them as they are able to bear.  ‘Line upon line, and precept upon precept, here a little and there a little,’ must be our rule.  Nothing will compensate for the absence of this tenderness and love.  Just so you must set before your children their duty-command, threaten, punish, reason-but if affection be wanting in your treatment, your labor will be all in vain.  Love is one grand secret of successful training.  Anger and harshness may frighten, but they will not persuade that child that you are right; and if he sees you often out of temper, you will soon cease to have his respect.  Try hard to keep a hold on your child’s affections.  It is a dangerous thing to make your children afraid of you.  ‘Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged’, (Col 3:21).  Let not the advice it contains be overlooked.”

-J.C. Ryle

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About Elizabeth

I am a sinner, saved by grace striving to increase in the knowledge of my Savior and His precious Word each day. The reader should know that there are a few presuppositions with which I approach this blog: 1) I believe in the biblical gospel, which basically purports that all mankind is born under the curse of sin (due to the sin of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden). Therefore, man is separated from God and can have no relationship with God because He is perfectly holy, not even able to look upon sin. Unfortunately, God is also perfectly just and must not only separate Himself from sin, but must also punish it. In order to reconcile man to Himself, God, the Father, sent God, the Son, down to earth to live as a man and take our sins upon Himself on the cross. While on the cross, God, the Son, bore the full weight of the wrath of God, the Father, against our sins in order that we who believe in Him might be set free from the curse of our sin. God, the Son, Jesus Christ, died as a propitiation for our sin in order to appease God, the Father's, holy and just character, redeem us from sin, and reconcile those who believe in this gospel to God, the Father. 2) I am primarily writing to those who already believe in this biblical gospel. In other words, this blog is not focused on evangelizing the lost, but edifying believers. 3) I believe that the Christian Bible is the very word of God. Therefore, it is completely inerrant, infallible, sufficient, and authoritative in the life of a believer.
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